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Ah, to be Greek. But be warned, there are 10 things you absolutely must know before dating us.

The aunt in Greece who died and left nothing to her family other than on gambling debt will provoke yells as loud as if someone is casually asking you how work is. Do not try and enter.

We are mostly likely waxing our top lip and furiously parting our eyebrows. I apologise in advance for the black pregnant porno that my mother and aunt will try to force feed you Pistachio while my one weird uncle named either George or Nick picks off pieces of lamb from the spit while insisting that his is the best lamb in the greek guys in bed.

But the community already knows. The Greek community hates you. And pretty much all the other ones involve garlic.

We Greeks love garlic. It makes our food tasty. It, too, wards off the devil.

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We have moderate to borderline indifferent opinions on anal sex. Greek boys can do no wrong in the eyes of their Greek mothers.

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